Responding to Holiday Stress When Living with OCD and Anxiety

If you read my last post about the hidden side of holiday stress when living with OCD and anxiety, you already know how easily the season can trigger intrusive thoughts, worry, and perfectionism.

Now, let’s talk about how to respond.

One of the most effective, research-backed approaches for managing OCD and anxiety is Exposure and Response Prevention (ERP). It works—but it takes patience, determination, and a willingness to lean into emotional vulnerability. It’s also about repetition, repetition, repetition.

But let’s be honest—the holidays are approaching quickly, and many of the scenarios I mentioned in my earlier post are right around the corner. When you’re juggling travel, family gatherings, and expectations, it can be hard to “turn on” your vulnerability switch or find time for consistent exposure practice.

Here are a few practical ways to prepare yourself this holiday season.

Realign With Your Values

Anxiety often targets what we care about most—our values.

Imagine this: you actually enjoy Thanksgiving because it means reconnecting with your favorite cousins. This year, you’re asked to lead the annual family activity. Within seconds, anxiety hits you with 101 possible disasters. To calm yourself, you start problem-solving each one—because that’s what anxiety tells you to do.

But here’s the trap: the more you problem-solve, the further you drift from your value (connection), and the stronger anxiety becomes. You start dreading Thanksgiving.

Instead, take a step back and realign with what truly matters to you.

Ask yourself:

• What upcoming situation or event are you most anxious about?

• What is most important to you about this situation or event?

• If anxiety or OCD weren’t around, how would you approach it differently?

• Are your current action steps truly aligned with your values—or with anxiety’s demands?

Sometimes, value-based action means showing up imperfectly but meaningfully.

Don’t Fall Into the Value Traps

A Value Trap happens when anxiety exaggerates what a valued action should look like.

Example: Anxiety might convince you that your home must be spotless and perfectly decorated before guests arrive. But the deeper value isn’t perfection—it might be creativity, connection, or comfort. When anxiety hijacks those values, you end up stressed, exhausted, and disconnected from what matters most.

Check in with yourself:

• Do you feel distressed or dissatisfied despite working hard toward a goal?

• Are your actions fueled by anxiety or by values?

If you notice you’re in a trap, experiment with doing things differently—what I like to call “breaking the anxiety playbook.”

Start small: maybe that means keeping the slightly overcooked dish instead of remaking it. Embrace imperfection as a quiet act of defiance against anxiety.

Beat Your Anxiety to the Punch

Here’s the truth: you can’t get rid of anxiety—and that’s okay. The more you fight it, the more power it gains.

So instead of waiting for anxiety to find you, go find it.

That’s right—beat it to the punch.

It may sound strange, but try leaning in. Notice where anxiety tends to show up—at the grocery store, while cooking, during conversations—and practice approaching those moments intentionally rather than avoiding them.

When you take the lead, you remind your brain that you can handle discomfort without needing to run from it. That’s ERP in action.

Final Thoughts

Anxiety and OCD don’t take holidays off—but you can still create meaningful, value-driven moments in their presence. With small, consistent shifts in how you respond, you can step into the season with more flexibility and self-compassion.

If you’d like to learn more about ERP, ACT, or ways to manage anxiety through the holidays, you can read my first post here or schedule a consultation to see how therapy can help you find calm and confidence this season.